|Fathers & Daddies
Our fathers impact our lives in more ways then we will ever know. Little boys "copy" or "imitate" their Daddies. Little boys try to walk and talk just like their daddies. Little girls look up to their daddies to love them. It is said that the love a father shows his daughter reflects the type of man she will marry.
My father wasn’t what the world would consider a ‘good’ man. He didn’t work most of my life, he drank, and he was addicted to drugs. But, even in the midst of those character flaws, I knew he loved me. Even when he wasn’t loveable, even when I didn’t care if he loved me, I knew he did. Somewhere deep inside, I knew it. He died a year ago, and even though I hadn’t physically seen him since 1978, I still miss him.
When my dad found out about the soon to be, Tirzah (my youngest daughter), he called me, after 20 years, I heard his voice. We talked, just like nothing had ever happened and that all was well. After a few more calls, and over the next few months, we spoke and he even apologized (through tears) for the mistakes he had made. He was truly repentant, and I believe in my heart of hearts that God allowed him as many years as he did…to finally come to the realization that he needed someone else. That someone was God.
My dad, credited Terrica (my eldest daughter) with his ‘change’—this granddaughter that he had never met or spoken to. Terrica was involved in a ministry internship at this time and she had been sending my dad her monthly newsletter. Through her allowing God to use her written word, my dad’s hard heart was softened. My dad also told me that he had looked up Tirzah’s name in the Bible. I suspect this was one of the first times he had cracked that book in many years.
I credit my dad’s personality and character flaws to forcing me to find someone totally different than what I remembered in a dad (recall the first paragraph about little girls/daddies). I wanted someone who would first, be the spiritual leader in our family (my dad didn’t go to church). I wanted someone that would take our marriage seriously and work towards a lasting relationship. I wanted someone who would take his ‘daddy’ chores to heart, and appreciate them. God gave me that, and so much more in Terry. I’m ever grateful that my daughters have Terry for a Daddy.
Isn’t it great how God works. How He allows things, like giving a seemingly no-good man, more years than he should have had, to be touched by his own grand-daughter. A granddaughter that is ‘here’ because his own daughter looked for someone opposite from him. A girl, that had she not allowed God full reign in her life, would never be in the position to write the newsletter. And allowed me, a few years with a father who turned into a Daddy. And mostly, to receive one more into His kingdom…with a clean and new heart for Him.
If you are a Dad, congratulations…you have one awesome job ahead of you!
Shanna Hoskison © June 2003